It’s almost been a full week since I last blogged. I haven’t really known what to post about… how I couldn’t cry? How I couldn’t eat? How I didn’t want to take a shower or get out of bed? How my Grandma would never tell me I shouldn’t cut my hair, tell me I’m halfway to 50, or comment on my tininess? I enjoyed her fawning over me… she fawned over all of us. All the time. And we fawned over her….
Anyways…I guess that is was you call depression/state of grief.
I don’t want to do anything with myself. I am back in Maryland, laying in bed, watching my DVR. I know I need to go to the grocery store, get my camera fixed, make a new appointment w/ the taxes people, shower, and clean… but I don’t want to do ANYTHING. I don’t even want to sit and watch Vampire Diaries! I want someone to appear with a steaming cup of coffee and to drive me around while they run errands so I don’t have to think about anything.
Help Bloggers. How do I get myself out of this rut??
Corinne says
I’m so sorry you are having such a rough time. It’s completely understandable that you are grieving the loss of your grandmother. I unfortunately don’t have any great words of wisdom and I hate that I can’t help! I think with time things will get back to where they used to be. I’m so sorry you are having such a rough time! 🙁
shutterbugwife says
I am so sorry. I lost my grandmother last year and it hit me pretty hard. Give yourself time and be patient. You need time to mourn and that’s ok and totally normal.
When you are ready, push yourself to do one small task, like running to the grocery store. Once you complete that, you will feel good enough to push for the next thing. The more you get out, the better you will feel.
One thing that helped when I lost my grandmother was my husband’s constant reminders of how my grandmother would want to me feel. I know she would not have wanted me to be depressed for months and lay on my couch all the time. She loved me and would want me to live my life. I tried to keep that in mind.
Caroline says
It WILL get better. Do something that makes your smile. Your grandmother would not want you to be sad. Do something to honor her memory! It’s hard, I know. But, it DOES get a bit easier.
Virginia Belle says
I am so sorry to hear about your Grandmother. It’s completely understandable that you would be feeling down right now. I’m sorry you’re going through such a tough time but know that things will get better. I’m thinking about you during this difficult time!
Bre says
Maybe it would help to think about the fact that she probably feels terrible that you feel this way and would never want you to be in such a funk about her passing. She is probably up there watching over you and trying to cheer you on to get back to your daily routine and smile again. I have experienced a lot of loss and grief in my life and although you get through the day-to-day operation of life, there are still days when you think of the person and cry, but sometimes you will also think of that person and smile for all of the joy they brought to your life. I hope you find sunshine soon!
brown eyed girl says
One day at a time, one thing at a time, take it easy on yourself and don’t be too hard on yourself. You just had a big loss and it’s going to take a while, how you’re feeling right now is okay…it will get better, one day at a time! I hope you’re doing well, get some rest tonight before school tomorrow – thinking of you! XOXO