It was bound to happen.
I knew I was going to hit a bump in the road on my way to “Happiness.”
I just didn’t know how or when or why.
I know why I have have hit this bump – and I blame myself. I am trying too hard. As part of my Happiness Project, I am trying to please others around me. That means I do things that I don’t normally like doing to make my loved ones happy (i.e. going out on a Sunday when all I want to do is stay in). Last weekend I did such a thing. I didn’t feel like going anywhere – I have this thing where I don’t like drinking 3 nights in a row because I get super hungover on the fourth morning. I feel super bloated, sad, tired, cranky, and sometimes even depressed. Think about yourself – if you had a few drinks on a Thurs, Fri, and Saturday night – how do you feel Sunday morning? I know I usually feel like hiding in my bed.
Anyways, I did this last weekend. I enjoyed some adult beverages on Fri, Sat, and Sun. And on Monday, when I had the day off, I didn’t do anything that I had planned. And I was really upset with myself. But keeping with my happiness project theme – I told myself, “It takes time. And there is no use crying over spilled milk. Just chalk this up as a loss and keep moving.”
Now, it’s Monday again, and I am mad at myself. Only this time things are a bit different.Yesterday I went to a friend’s house to watch Football. In all honesty, I only went for my husband and my friend. I would’ve much rather had stayed home. My stomach hurt, I had a ton of stuff that needed to be done around the house and for school. HOWEVER, I knew that if I stayed home I wouldn’t have done a darn thing. So I went to make everyone happy. And I had fun. And I had some wine – because my stomach hurt and red wine always helps my sick tummy. But then I ate some snacks that weren’t agreeable with my IBS/Lactose Intolerant Diet because they looked tasty. And then I came home and layed on the couch and watched Lifetime movies and did nothing that needed to be done. Bad move Mrs. Bear.
So here lies my problem: How do I continue on a road to happiness with this giant bump in my way?
AUGH it’s like you’re speaking to me right now.
So this weekend I decided I wanted to go tailgating and have some fun. Well, I may have had one-too-many (I’m definitely not 21 anymore) and when hubby decided he had enough and was tired, hot and getting sunburned I turned into a cranky baby instead of being supportive, understanding, and loving. YIKES. Not.ok. Plus then all that happened was me feeling like crap on Sunday. I always do this – I tell myself I’m going to cut back and limit myself to 2 drinks and I do reallllly well for a long time, then there is one moment where I give in and things go bad. I realize not everyone is perfect and we all indulge in one-too-many sometimes but it doesn’t take away how crappy (physically and emotionally) you feel the next day.
Well, Mrs.Bear…I too suffer from the syndrome called “please others first and thyself last”. It sucks because when you are a selfless and caring person(like us)you tend to always want to make others happy. All I can honestly say is it’s good to compromise sometimes to make others happy, but sometimes you just have to say “no thanks” and do what you want to do, epecially if you know the outcome is gonna be bad and in the end your gonna feel horriable or be angry at yourself. If people, be it friends, husbands,co-workers or family really love you, they will understand that sometimes everyone needs to make themselves happy first and foremost 🙂
And as far as the drinking, ugh..I hear you on that. I drank on Thursday, Friday and Staurday…BUT I put on my happy face and went out anyway and that is why I was tired as a dog on Sunday and felt like I got ran over by a train!! This is a bump in the road that I myself still needs to learn to get over….. The things we do for love :-/
Don’t stress too much I think we all do this!! You have to remember that usually in the moment you’re having fun and sometimes the little stuff doesn’t really matter, you know dirty laundry can sit if you’re out making good memories with friends!
As far as drinking goes I just usually make a rule that I only have 2-3 drinks per night at the most, especially if I’ve had too much fun one night that weekend!
My sister in law has her first baby recently and reminded me to enjoy all the time out with friends and lazy hangover days because those disappear once you have kids-so I try to remember that too!