Last year at this exact moment … I was hiding from Mr. Bear because he had some nasty sickness and I didn’t want to have that sickness on my wedding day.
Then… one year ago tomorrow, I came down with the sickness… and boy did it suck. But by Saturday I didn’t care and I had the best day of my life marrying my best friend and celebrating with everyone we both love.
Here is a direct quote from how I was feeling on this very night last year:
“I can’t describe how I’ve been feeling lately. I am so so so excited – but also worried that this is all a big dream and I am going to wake up any minute, sitting in my bed in my parents house, 18 years old, and in high school. I never thought when I met Mr. H almost six and a half years ago he would be my husband. I may have dreamt about – and wrote in my diary about what an amazing kisser he was, haha – but I certainly couldn’t have imagined I would be so lucky to find my soul mate, my best friend, and the love of my life on that ginormous cruise ship.”
My feelings are definitely a bit different tonight. I have this weird sadness in my tummy… that a whole year flew by without being knowing. Then again, we accomplished so many things and made SO many changes in our life together, that its no wonder the year snuck by.
Sunday is our one year anniversary. Am I supposed to be excited? Am I supposed to feel a bit sad?
How crazy is it that Mr. Bear had a surprise trip planned to Florida for this weekend and the hotel we were to stay at had a fire and the pool/bar area burned down?
How about the fact that Mr. Bear is leaving tomorrow for California and doesn’t come back until Friday night? That means I have to sit here all week, alone, feeling confused, nostalgic, depressed, anxious… basically a big nasty hot mess.
Right now I don’t know what to think… or feel… any advice?